Lunch

February 26, 2010

Is there anything better in life than enjoying a meal with family or good friends? I enjoy ‘breaking bread’ with friends at noon, in part because I have a chance to work or walk off the indulgent calories, it is usually less costly than dinners, and we are more on top of our game midday than at night. I have taken to heart the idea that we should eat breakfast like a king, enjoy lunch like a knight, and refrain at dinner like a pauper.

I offer a caveat associated with lunching with me. The urgency of shifting our strategies as a human family has prompted my willingness to confront both my own behavior and that of my friends. A long time ago I recognized that a guiding principle that can transform lives is for one who cares to be able to confront. If I did not give a darn about the future of my grandchildren I would probably be playing gin rummy at the club; or indulging in some self absorbing ritual. I care about tomorrow for them, and thus I am risking confronting those systems that will prevent their having a healthy life today.

As warned by those who have experienced grandchildren before me, “they will change your life.” Yes indeed, for the last 10 years my inner angst has been about the future of 3 young children that call me Popeye; thus a constant evaluation of my attempt to make a difference in this world has become the primary focus of my life.

Here is where lunch comes in to play. I have now begun to ask our grandparent friends of their concern for tomorrow’s generations; and what, if anything we should all be doing? I intone poetically that bridge, endless travel, golf, and the pursuit of hobbies will not get the job done; though I must admit I like all of the above. Furthermore, adults do not need to be informed by another pretty sunset, magical fjord, African animal, mountain stream, or Cape Cod day – we’ve been there, done that and our touch with nature has informed us forever. But what about our grandkids having those same teachers?

I remember catching an 10 lb bluefish off of Monomoy Point, Cape Cod, only to return it to the sea explaining to my children that the fatty tissue of the larger blues contain pcb’s in quantities unsafe if consumed regularly. I caught these very tasty fish as a boy – now we only take the 4-7 ‘pounders’ and are careful to remove all the dark meat before eating. Yet, I want my grandkids to experience the pleasure of fishing for dinner.

Thus, in this context my lunch with good friend, and former children’s movie and television executive Bill Bauman resulted in an examination of his retirement plans; and mine as well. He is a bit younger, and looks it, and when he told me he had joined the Art Council of Cincinnati, I cared enough to confront. He has three grandchildren as well. Wrong answer - I thought to myself – he was joining the age-old paradigm for retiring executives - to serve on art, hospital, music, theater etc. boards is standard retirement practice.

Nothing wrong with this in principle and the arts need support, and Katy and I surround ourselves with art in our home, but the culturally accepted behavior is not enough; and in some cases it is almost like whittling on the front porch as the house burns to the ground.

It is clearer by the year that every able bodied voice must join the chorus, in one’s own unique way, to sustain the future. A good chorus, a well tuned orchestra consists of diversity of talents, voices, and instruments enabling harmony. Every person counts today. No one should be left behind as we build a full participation chorus echoing the cry – ‘this is not about us – we have already experienced the joy of creation; it is now our grandchildren’s turn.’

Call me for lunch – let’s talk.